Of course, there are many differences between having a baby
and running a marathon – obviously, one being the end reward – in one case you
get a baby, and in the other case you get a medal and t-shirt. Nonetheless, I still think my experience with
running a marathon has enlightened me about this whole labor and delivery
journey.
Looking back on my marathon, I would not describe it as
“painful”. I would tell you that it was
one of the hardest things I ever did, but I wouldn’t tell you it was
excruciatingly painful – because it wasn’t.
I look back on it with joy and a sense of accomplishment. Yeah, it was really extremely difficult, but
I’d do it again someday.
I’m approaching having a baby with the same attitude I had
going into my marathon. I decided to do
a marathon and I committed myself to whatever it took to get it done. Similarly, I am determined to bring this baby
into a peaceful, calm, loving environment.
I know it’s not going to be a walk in the park, but it also doesn’t have
to be a traumatizing experience. It will
still be hard work, but if I prepare myself adequately, it doesn’t have to be
painful. The main point being – I don’t
have to be afraid. Women have been
giving birth since the beginning of time…only recently did women start running
marathons.
The reason I was successful in completing my marathon had to
do with three important factors. First,
I trained for several months. My body
was in condition to run really long distances.
Second, I had incredible support from my husband. During training, he encouraged me when I was
down, he helped me get up for my early morning runs, and he taught me tricks
and tips from his own experience (he also ran a marathon). Then, during the race, he took care of the
logistics, he was there cheering me on, and he even ran a total of about 6
miles next to me throughout the whole thing.
He believed in me. He knew I
could do it. And that is powerful stuff.
That brings up the last factor, mentally preparedness. I knew the race itself was going to be more
mentally challenging than physically challenging. I knew that toward the end of the race, I
would have to fight the demons in my head trying to convince me it was better
to stop. Yet, because I knew this was
going to happen, I mentally prepare to keep going even when my will-power was
growing weak. By the time race-day came,
I was determined to finish. Nothing or
no one could have stopped me from completing my goal. I was so focused that toward the end, around
mile 24, I tuned out all of my surroundings and concentrated on looking
straight forward, putting one foot in front of the other. You could say I entered a sort of
“self-hypnosis”.
I am approaching the arrival of our son or daughter with all
three of those factors in mind, especially considering the mental preparation. Because of my experience with depression and
anxiety, I am keenly aware of the body/mind connection. If your mind’s not onboard, then your body
will reflect how you feel. You have to
lead with your mind and the body will follow.
You can accomplish amazing feats when, in your head, you believe you
can.
The same is true for birthing. If you are afraid, you will be tense and not be
able to let your body do what it is made to do.
If you don’t believe you can do it, then you won’t. But, if you are aware of the power of your
body, then you can.
In order to prepare for labor, I’ve been practicing these relaxation
methods to maintain an overall state of calm.
Lots of hardcore runners will tell you, in order to stay relaxed and not
waste extra energy, you must keep your facial muscles loose and relaxed. I practiced this every run. A mind that is stressed and afraid will
reflect in a body that is tense and rigid.
To be able to finish a long distance race, you have to stay calm and
relaxed – and it begins with the muscles in the face. I think the same is true for birthing.
In the past, I’ve utilized meditation tracks to help me
overcome my anxiety. Slow breathing,
eyes closed, peacefully music… Essentially, I’m doing the same thing now, only
with more of a centralized focus on the task at hand – labor and delivery. I’m working on achieving a state of calm no
matter what’s going on around me. I
cannot believe how much it has changed my attitude – I’m not afraid or dreading
the experience anymore – I am actually excited about this labor of love and
can’t wait to bring our child into this world.
Practicing these relaxation techniques are going to help me
with more than just having a baby. I
know that these skills will help me with future stressful situations. Hopefully, I will be able to continue to
reduce my anxiety so that the baby will have a loving, peaceful mom and a
happy, positive environment throughout the duration of his or her life.
Books I’ve recently read that have helped me form these
thoughts:
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