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| {Photo credit to Craig Borchers} |
Eating is an emotional
experience as well as a physical experience.
However, if you use food to cope with all your emotions, food will begin to take control of your life
instead of enhancing the quality of your life.
Do you feel like you have a good relationship with food?
Do you find yourself eating when you’re not hungry, or
eating to until you are uncomfortably full?
Or do you eat too little when you are stressed out or anxious? Do you taste your food, or do you eat without
thinking? Do you ever regret eating
something? Do you beat yourself up for
overeating?
First and foremost, it is OK. It is OK if you eat too much sometimes. And it is OK if you eat too little
sometimes. We are human; we’re not going
to have perfect eating habits.
Second, because food is such a big part of our lives (we eat
three meals a day, we need food to live, and food often brings people
together), I think it is important to have a peaceful relationship with food.
I want to have a normal, healthy view of eating.
For me personally, a normal relationship with food is all
about peace and compassion. It is about
feeling good about my food choices and not obsessing about right and
wrong. And just as important, it is
about being kind to myself when I do make mistakes or feel bad about what I ate;
whether I physically feel bad, or I mentally feel guilty. I don’t want to be anxious around food. I don’t want to miss out on parties and
gatherings because I am afraid to eat in front of people. I don’t want to use food to comfort all my
feelings. I don’t want to eat in secret
because I am ashamed of eating. And I
don’t want to let my fear of food stop me from having a fulfilling life.
Sometimes an unnatural relationship with food can lead to an
eating disorder. Not all eating
disorders are characterized by starvation or purging. Click here and here to read more about Binge Eating
Disorder.
Many people, including me, use food to cope with difficult
emotions, because, well, eating is an
emotional experience. Food nourishes
more than just your body. Eating food can
nourish your mind, your soul, and your heart.
On the flip side, keep in mind that you can nourish yourself
in many different ways. Food is only one
way we nourish ourselves. Exercising,
reading, conversations, work, prayer, creating, and other things nourish the whole self as well.
With this preface in mind, keep reading to find out 8 practical
ways to stop emotional overeating:
1. Become self-aware. Figure out your needs. If you are feeling anxious and a little
unsettled, close your eyes, put your hand over your heart and ask yourself what
you truly need right now. Maybe you need
to have a conversation with your significant other. Maybe you need to say “no” to
a favor asked of you. Maybe you need to go
to bed early or take a nap. Why? Well, by taking a few moments to become
self-aware, you might understand why you are upset or angry or scared, and you
won’t immediately turn to food to comfort those uncomfortable emotions. A lot of times, if you use food to soothe
your feelings, you end up feeling worse than when you started. You didn’t take care of your true needs so
now you feel defeated because of overeating and you still feel unsettled with
whatever emotion is bothering you at that time.
2. Eat with your five
senses. Eat slowly, take small
bites, smell your food, notice the colors, textures and flavors. Use all your five senses in your eating
experience. Whether you are eating a
meal or a snack, you can use this technique.
Look at your food – look at the bite you are about to take, notice what
it is, and ask yourself if it looks good or bad or neither. Smell your food – smell the aromas of your
plate and your surroundings, does it smell good or bad to you, ask yourself what
it reminds you of because smells contain powerful memories. Feel your food with your fingers if it is
finger food – is it hot to the touch, is the steam rising up in your face, does
it feel squishy or hard, do you like the way it feels in your hands? Listen to your meal – maybe your meal is
sizzling hot, and also listen to your surroundings, maybe the environment is
noisy and chaotic or maybe it is completely quiet. Last but not least, taste your food – really
taste your food, ask yourself questions about it, savor each bite slowly, chew
slowly and thoroughly. Do you like it,
or does your meal not taste as good as you thought it would? If you don’t like it, you don’t have to eat
it. If you love it, you have permission
to eat a second helping.
3. Eat without
distractions. That means no iPad,
computer, TV, phone, etc. Even put down
your novel. If you want to stop
emotional overeating, then you must be
present each time you eat. Mindless
overeating happens most often when you are distracted by something else. In our current society, it is really
difficult to eat alone, especially in public.
I am guilty of pretending to be on my phone or my computer when I eat,
because I am afraid of what other people will think of me. Remind yourself, that you have a right to
eat, and you have a right to enjoy what you are eating. If you are distracted when you eat, then you
won’t be able to recognize when you are full.
Also, you won’t be able to remember the experience of eating; therefore
you are more likely to eat more and more frequently because your emotions
aren’t satisfied.
4. Make yourself
delicious and nutritious meals. You
don’t have to do this every day because it might get you stressed out. However, from time to time, take the time for yourself and make a
meal you love. Maybe you don’t even know
what you love. Figure out what your
favorite foods. What are you craving
right now at this moment? Do you want a
hearty, home-cooked beef stew? Or does a
cucumber salad sound good? When I first
started “intuitive eating”, I was afraid that I would like everything. I was afraid that, if I gave myself
permission to eat, that I would eat everything in sight. Well, I was partly right because I discovered
there were few foods I wouldn’t try at least once, but I don’t like
everything. I don’t like some things
some days and other things other days.
And I don’t eat everything in sight either. Because I am aware of what I need and aware
of what I eat, I am satisfied and can move on to other things.
5. Remind yourself
that you do not have to earn the
right to eat food. We eat food to
live and to enhance the quality of our life.
It’s a necessity and a pleasure.
You DON’T have to exercise first, you DON’T have to skip a few meals in
between, and you DON’T have to “make up” for the calories you eat.
6. Give yourself
permission to eat ANY food. Food is
good. There are NO bad foods. Remind yourself as often as it takes that you
can eat later if you get hungry again.
You will not eat the whole batch of chocolate chip cookies tonight, if you
have permission to eat some again tomorrow.
You are allowed to have food preferences. And you NEVER have to apologize for what you
eat. There are no set rules that
everyone must follow. When it comes to
food, you have to figure out what is good for you.
7. Take time for
yourself. Take a bath or a shower, get
a massage, curl up with a good book, or listen to classical music. Go to a local café and sit on a sidewalk seat
with a cappuccino. If you tell yourself
that you do not have the time then you will believe that excuse. But if you make yourself a priority, you will
magically find the time. No need to feel
guilty. Taking care of yourself will
make you a better person. If you take
time for yourself, you will be a better wife, friend, mother, worker, giver,
teacher, etc. If you are having a
difficult time taking care of yourself first, treat yourself like your own best
friend. Imagine you are on the outside
looking in on your life. Be kind and compassionate
to yourself. Treat yourself with the
love you would show to another loved one.
8. Practice
relaxation techniques. Slowing down
is one of the most effective ways to stop emotional overeating. Stress does crazy things to our bodies. It messes with our hormones and brain
chemicals and makes us do stuff we wouldn’t normally do. Relaxing for only 20 minutes a day will help
you make better decisions not only about food but also about life in general.
The bottom line is to remember that life is not perfect. You are not perfect, and I am not perfect. We are human - we’re not going to have perfect eating habits. But if you follow these steps, I guarantee you will have a better relationship with food and a more nourishing life.
If you liked this post, check out these articles with
similar topics:
Relaxation, the Remedy for the Modern World10 Reasons to Give Up Dieting
Intuitive eating - One Way to Stop Emotional Overeating
How to Stop Binge Eating
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